Back in the saddle

Earlier this week, RGH enticed me back onto two wheels. Two very cool wheels that have been hanging up in the garage since last summer with a slightly mangled back wheel.

My lovely summer ride. And a knitted monkey.

We cycled past this very interesting pub .... please note I said we cycled PAST it (well, it was early. And ok, so I rattled the doors, but nope. They wouldn't let us in)

As far as I could tell they had neither a drum nor a monkey, but luckily we'd taken our own drum monkey with us. And he wasn't impressed by what was outside the pub .......

Anyone got any tomatoes?

RGH and I used to have a tandem. I always liked to cycle up front, but 007 was happy going pillion .....

Maybe it was the extra knitted weight, but RGH soon had a puncture ......

Yep. That's flat alright mate.

007 and I kept very busy while RGH was working on his tyre.

And eventually we got to Cheddar Gorge.

Normally we walk up and along the gorge but after all that cycling action I 007 really wasn't up for it

And I he was relieved when we could sit down with a coffee and some shortbread biscuits




Unfortunately RGH had to deal with his flat tyre again ..... he got quite an audience at one point doing this in Cheddar high street. How bizarre!

On the way back we stopped for "liquid refreshments" opposite this lovely building ......

But when I was posing 007 for this picture ......


...... I sadly realised that the days are limited for this blog. When a man walked past explaining to his kids that I was anthropomorphism-ing my knitted monkey (bright kids!) I realised just how sad/mad/bad I must look. At least when the RBD's are with me there's an outside chance that the monkey could be theirs, but as they're getting less and less keen to be seen out with us (strange, I know!) my monkey antics will look more and more odd. Sigh.



But I'm not done yet. News of the latest monkey cellmate tomorrow.

A few things .....

In no particular order .......

I'm loving this ......

...... my friend sent me this picture as she knows I like coffee and monkeys and muffins (I'm still waiting for that to arrive). I'm thinking of taking this photo in to Coffee#1 next time we go (today hopefully) and asking if they can recreate it. On the other hand, I don't want to upset them as they may ditch the RaWCC muffin again. And nobody wants me attempting to bake muffins at home again.

Why oh why is it taking me so long to finish this?

Given the size of the HP range you'd have thought it would have flown off my needles. Could it be that :-

• a) I've lost my monkey mojo (please God, no!)
• b) I've eaten too many jam creams and my fingers have become too pudgy to finish the sewing-up
• c) RGH keeps taking me out on day trips and distracting me in other cunning ways?

(It's hell)

Right. Well. I suppose I can put it off no longer - I've been waiting for it to get light enough to take a picture or two of the monkey back-pack draw - the moment you've all some of you have been waiting for .....

(for those of you not familiar with Mr Blobby ..... be glad, be very glad ..... or click here to be enlightened)

(Mr Blobby)

Oops, and there I go again, getting distracted from the task in hand. So without further ado, the winner of the exclusive Monkee Maker monkey back-pack made of knit is .................

Nia

So Nia, PLEASE could you email me a forwarding address at monkeemaker@yahoo.co.uk so that I can start to clear out the spare room, and sorry everyone else. Who knows, when this whole fiasco is a dim and distant memory maybe I'll attempt another, better monkey backpack.

But don't hold your breath.

And a Brazilian for the monkey, please

This time last week I was psyching myself up for my six weekly hair ripping torture treatment (I'm quite hairy), but this time I thought I'd take a monkey (or two) with me.




No. 11 and HP2 (before he went away) were up for it. No. 11 even said that whatever I could stand, he could stand. Mwah ha ha.





Although he had reservations ......

No. 11 : This isn't going to hurt, is it?

Me (yes, I've reached a new low .... admitting that I actually talk to the monkeys) : No, No. 11, it'll be a doddle.

No. 11 prepares himself and gets nice and relaxed, while HP2 looks on .......

HP2 : Well, it looks good so far

Until ...... THE WAXING STRIP OF DOOM!!!! (And at this stage please note the bars on the windows so that once you've come down from the ceiling and are clawing the walls ...... there is NO ESCAPE)

No. 11 : AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Me : Hello!! Welcome to my world!

No. 11 : WHAT THE FFFFF..........lip????

HP2 : Umm, can we go home now please?

No. 11 : Promise to never ever EVER bring me here again

Me : Wait til you have your tache waxed. That'll make your eyes water.

HP2 was worried as he's hairy too.





But I reassured him that Amy probably likes her monkeys hairy. (I may have also mentioned that it's only the female of the species that needs to make sure she is perfectly plucked and fuzz-free ...... although maybe not as that would be far too political for me)

He felt a bit better then.

FINAL CALL FOR THE MONKEY BACK-PACK .....

Don't look at me, I'm shy!

The draw (once again) to rid me of this pesky novelty back-pack is tomorrow, so get over to this post for a chance to win it. (And PLEASE remember to come back to claim him, should you be unlucky enough to win him!)

A present ...... for me

Last week I ordered one of these fabulous pouches from paper-and-string as a gift for someone ....







..... but when it got here it was so fabulous that I decided to keep it for myself. There was even a little surprise wrapped up inside. I won't tell you what it was though, because that would, you know, ruin said surprise.


I chose the one with the cupcake motif - even though there was one with a monkey on it! (Tough choice but I like cakes muffins too and I love the lining in this one)

So I've added my own little monkey/monster adornment ......







Monda has really started a big monster movement - I got this phone charm in Borders the other day and they're EVERYWHERE!


This pouch is great for keeping your phone and keys in .......





...... or ladies things (no photo necessary) ......




But what I most like to keep in mine is ......

...... my emergency chocolate supply.

In other news, I'm working on a little something new .....

..... I know, it doesn't look much like a you-know-what ...... yet.

And there's only two more days to enter my monkey back-pack competition, by leaving a comment on this post and I'll pick a name out of the hat on Thursday.

Right, we're off to the beach. I did mention we're on holiday this week didn't I? Anyone seen 007's wetsuit?

Yesterday ......

...... all my troubles seemed so far away ...... until I decided to do this ......

..... slide down this steep and shiny CLIFF-FACE!! No really, it's steeper and longer than it looks.

After years of "holding the coats" while RGH and the RBD's risked life and limb throwing themselves down it, I finally plucked up the courage (well, no one was around). See how shiny it is from thousands of botties sliding down and buffing it over the years? That makes it very quite reasonably fast .....

And I only screamed once.

RGH didn't scream at all.

And the reason for such frivolity? Well, we were celebrating. Because ......

THEY'RE BACK!!!

WOOO HOOOOO!!! We'd only nipped into Coffee#1 for a coffee, not even daring to hope that the gorgeousness that is the Raspberry and White Choc Chip muffin would be available, but it was! In a fit of Tom Cruise-esque madness I leapt up onto one of the leather armchairs and started jumping on it, "Woo-hooing" ...... ok I didn't do that really. Much too British, but I did do that crazy slide of death!

And I can't believe I didn't have a monkey on me to celebrate the auspicious return of the RaWCC muffin - I know, I should carry one with me at all times - but here's one I saw in a shop window ......

..... not really my usual style, what with all the fur instead of knit, but beggars can't be choosers.

Anyway, back at Monkee Towers, we had a flying visit from No. 8.

..... he was keen to catch up with 007 (who was his usual cool calm and collected self)

He's quite the stylish monkey-about-town, what with the Radley bag ......

..... well, his person is anyway ......

..... they're quite close .....

..... at least I thought they were until she tried to throw him from the car as they were leaving ......

And over on the win-my-monkey-backpack news desk ......

For a chance to win this monkey backpack just leave a comment on this post and I'll pick the winning name out of a hat on Thursday.

Happy Bank Holiday Monday - for anyone who has a day off today. And for anyone who doesn't ..... shame.

Random Monkey Shots #15 and #16

Watching the world go by with RGH and a half-pint

...... not a knitted half-pint, you understand. A real half-pint.

But please take note, Ladies and Gentlemen, that too many half-pints and you may think you're invincible, or worse ......

SUPER-MONKEY!!!!

You have been warned

Oops, nearly forgot this .....

Please make my monkey back-pack smile again by winning him and wearing him out in public (and then sending me photographic evidence). Just leave a comment on this post and the winner will be picked from my knitted hat on Thursday.

You Guys!

Some of you seem to be confusing me with someone who isn't really really REALLY lazy busy. And while I'd love to help you out with a pattern for the half-pint monkeys by writing all this out neatly and legibly and filling in the gaps that I've just been ad-libbing .......

...... I'm afraid I just can't be bothered haven't got the time. Sorry.

But please trust me on this ...... if you print out this pattern, then get hold of one of these ......

...... and on all of the instructions on the pattern divide by 3 then times by two, pretty soon you'll have a monkey that looks something like this .....

Or possibly this .......

...... depending on which yarn you choose. It's not magic it's just maths. And if I can do it then anyone can do it!

So. Go forth and multiply ...... but don't forget to divide by 3 first.

And in other news .......

Fancy a cool slightly weird monkey back-pack? For a chance to win this one, just leave a comment on this post by next Thursday.

(stop looking at my messy kitchen!)

Right, I'm off to find a new stat counter as apparently I broke the terms and conditions of my last one. Oops. I'm such a rebel.